Dating in Your 40’s

I’ve been resisting the cold, hard fact that dating in your 40’s is difficult (to say the least). I didn’t want to put that negativity out there and I wanted to stay hopeful that love does exist in your 40’s, but the truth is– it really sucks trying to find it and here’s why:

  • The good men are all married and will stay married. Why? Because they’re good to their women and no woman in their right mind is going to let them go. They are a dying bread…an anomaly really.
  • The good ones that do get divorced are heartbroken and want revenge on their cheating ex-wives and what better way to seek revenge than to date a young 20-year-old or at the very least a girl in her early 30’s that still has perky breasts.
  • Then there are those that are “chronic bachelors”. These are the trolls you find on Tinder. These dudes are usually commitment phobes and typically set in their ways. By the time, they finally decide that they want to settle down, I can guarantee that they don’t want to marry some old broad that can’t give them their mid-life crisis love child…so we lose to the 20-30 somethings yet again.
  • The old geezers are the only ones left and they think a woman in their 40’s is still young, but they need Viagra to get it up and a Red Bull to stay awake. Oh Dios mio!!

Okay, so maybe that sounds a little too cynical even for me, but I’ve recently lost a little hope when it comes to dating in your 40’s. I’ve had so many friends tell me that they don’t understand why I’m still single because I have “so much going for me” then they proceed to compliment my looks, brains and personality then add how I’m not crazy either! Gee…thanks. That makes me feel so much better about myself. :/

The one thing I don’t have going for me (because not being crazy is debatable) is that I’m not young anymore.  Ding Ding Ding! That’s the reason! I hate to admit it, but it’s the truth. Sure, there are a few good single men in their 40’s out there, that just married the wrong people, but I feel like they make up .00001% of the population and they live in the Midwest somewhere. I hear Utah is nice.

Of course, the next response I always get is that I should just date younger men. Why the hell would I invest in a relationship with a young guy that eventually will want to settle down and have kids when my baby maker is boarded up with condemned signs hanging up on the sides of my uterus? It’s a complete waste of time and I’m not going to compete with chicks that don’t even know what Spanx are for…no thank you. If I looked like JLo then hell yeah, I would date young guys, but I look more like the mom from Growing Pains or Mrs. Brady.

Let’s face it, dating in your 40’s is rough. I haven’t gone on a date since last May. Jesus! That’s almost a year! Granted I turned down a few dates since that time and haven’t wanted to get out there much because my winter fluff has turned into winter flub.

Luckily, I’m back on track and ready to eat right and exercise again which will help pull me out of my dry spell, but I’m struggling with getting back out there again.  Dating is exhausting. All my married friends think it’s so exciting and new…well, it’s not…it sucks.

First you have to strike up conversation with random strangers and answer the same stupid questions over and over again. Here they are:

  • Where are you from?
  • What do you do for work?
  • What do you do for fun?
  • Do you date a lot?

Then it gets a little deeper…

  • What are you looking for in a relationship?
  • Do you have kids?
  • Do you want kids?

Then it reverts back to the superficial shit…

  • Do you like sports?
  • Did you see the latest Superhero movie?
  • Do you like dogs?

Then it might get serious again…

  • How long were you married?
  • Why did you get divorced?
  • Did you vote for Trump?

Then it goes left into the gutter because it’s getting late…

  • How tall are you?
  • Are you a real blonde?
  • What are you wearing right now?
  • What color are your panties?

That’s when I end the conversation and do it all over again. Ugh. Single ladies, you know what I’m talking about don’t you?! All I can say is, I can’t wait for the day when that special someone walks into my life and makes me believe in love again. Until then…it just sucks.

With Faith, Hope and Love,

~Teresa

#40andfabulous

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