It has been weeks since I’ve wanted to write. I could blame it on the holidays and this crazy time of year, but that would be a lie. The truth is…the hard to admit truth is that I’ve been hiding in my shame. One week before Christmas, I was hurrying home from work excited about the news that my youngest son was accepted into college with a partial scholarship. As I went to open the front door, there were papers rolled up and shoved inside the door handle. I froze for a minute because I knew what was coming. It had been coming for a while, but I wasn’t expecting…

Recently, I spoke with a young woman that reached out to me for some advice because she is struggling in her marriage. I have never met the woman and it can be difficult to counsel people via text because you can’t fully understand a person’s true feelings without speaking to them in person or even over the phone. She has two young kids under the age of five and she has been fighting with her husband and feels like her marriage is fractured. She works full time and finds the time to work out most days, but when it comes to going out with friends and leaving her husband with…

I read a lot of books, blogs, and articles about personal development and listen to endless hours of podcasts with women sharing their stories about divorce and surviving an affair. I guess I appreciate hearing how other people dealt with the pain and got through the hard times. It makes me feel like I’m not alone. That my continual journey with remnants of the scars left behind is not in vain.  It helps me to realize that everyone deals with their pain in their own unique way, yet our stories intertwine. One path is no better than another’s really. If you want to dwell on the pain longer than someone…

I finally did it. I put the crack pipe down and walked away. I deleted the dating apps from my phone and vowed to never return. I have come to the point where I realized that I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than to subject myself to the psychological fuckery that is found online. To those of you brave souls that found love online—congratulations, you have beaten the odds. According to the latest research, only 5% of Americans that are married or in a long-term relationship met online. That coupled with the fact that statistically 66% of people using dating apps have not gone out…

There is a shift happening in my life. I’m not quite sure if it’s that I’m finally turning the corner or I’m falling into a deep depression. Depending on the day, it can feel like both. Here we are in November and last January, I decided to completely transform my life. I promised myself that 2018 was going to be the year that my life was going to manifest into everything I desire. I was going to lose weight, find the love of my life, get a big promotion, doing what I love and be well on my way to becoming a best-selling author. Well…I did lose 35 pounds so…

For those of you that read my blog regularly, you know that I have had a pretty disastrous, sometimes amusing experiences with dating. Remember the time I went out to NoHo (North Hampton) on my first online date and the guy put his hands around my neck when he kissed me good night? I really should have stopped there, but I had hope that it was just a fluke and it could only go up from there. Boy, was I wrong. Then there was the time I went out with the guy with the stutter from New Haven.  That date ended in a lock-down situation when his crazy “ex” girlfriend…

As I scroll through countless posts from the wounded souls out there recovering from divorce, I’m reminded of my own journey and the stages of grief you go through to get past it. My heart goes out to those women (and men) that seem to be stuck in the black hole of anger and despair. I remember those feelings of shame and fear of the unknown. I see so many posts of people wanting their ex back in their lives, so desperately holding on to a love they once had. I wish I could reach out my hand, pull them out of that dark hole, and show them how to…

I think we can all agree divorce is one of the most difficult things you can go through in life. At first, there is the initial fear of worrying about the kids and how you’re going to make it on your own financially. After the anger subsides and the assets are divided, you’re left with the feeling of loss. Even when you wanted out of the marriage, you go through the stage of regret. You wonder if you could have done more to work on your marriage. You wonder if you let the fantasy of being with someone new cloud your judgment. Reality hits and once the ink dries on…

A friend of mine tried to set me up on a date last weekend. We all met out at a restaurant for her birthday and he just happen to be there—no pressure at all, right? I have to say, I would much rather go on a blind date alone than have an entire audience of friends watching us like some reality dating show.  The anticipation of meeting this person was exciting to me though because I had built it up in my head that this was how I was going to meet the man of my dreams. After countless encounters with men online–having half-hearted conversations that go absolutely nowhere or…

I believe that being self-reflective is the key to finding balance and better version of you. All day every day we have this inner dialogue that somehow makes us view ourselves from the outside in–making us question our motivation, our value and our interpersonal relationships. Frankly, it’s annoying. Do you ever get sick of that little shit making you doubt yourself? Don’t you wish that little voice in your head that has you beating yourself up over some stupid thing you said or did would just leave you the hell alone? Perhaps, this is the first time you ever thought of it. Maybe you’re one of the lucky ones that…